Credit where it's dew.

Its 12.30 am on Saturday, and I'm alone in the flat, everyone else having gone to Space, gone home or just plain gone to bed. Its been a stressful week, saved by a good friday, and hopefully a good weekend (that is, one that involves Newcastle getting more than just one shot on target). And there's no Rugby on either. Which is always nice. But none of you want to hear about my week. Instead you all want to know about the credit crunch. 'Cos you haven't heard enough about it already....
With the present "Global Economy" possessing the same stability as the Chelsea Manager's job, here are Dave's Top Tips for surviving the Credit Crunch:

• Don't buy anything. At all. Scavenge on the streets for other people's cast off food. Wear bin bags, and sleep in the boughs of trees. In the (misquoted) words of someone or other, "A dog is just two meals away from a becoming a wolf". That has no bearing on this current situation, but it is something to bear in mind.
• If living as a well-read tramp doesn't excite you, try spending less money. Drink spirits neat instead of as mixers, watch TV with your nose pressed up to the shop window rather than buying a licence, or just take up petty theft to ease the burden on your wallet.
• Listen to the Pigeon Detectives' slaughter of Hot Chip's "Ready for the Floor" on the Live Lounge. Its three minutes of sonic horrificness may lead to some aural bleeding, but it will definitely take your mind off the fact that you have no money. In fact, all you'll be able to think about is getting as far away from the speakers as possible without crossing an ocean.

So there it is. Three guaranteed ways to come out of the Credit Crisis unscathed (except for your ears). Just call me Guru. Although I have just noticed a crushed Mini Cheddar mingling with the layers of slowly decomposing paper on my desk, so I'm going to leave now.

Bloc Party Countdown: 7 months and 17 days till Kele Orekeke mysteriously disappears.....

Song of the Day: Spiders - Editors. "With your back to the wall, Sometimes its all better on your own". Written after Tom Smith had attended an LGBT night. Now just imagine if I set up a Union night for Straight people only. Imagine the uproar. And now guess what I'm going to be proposing on Monday....

Am I insane? The talking candy floss next to me doesnt think so.

Insanity. Wikipedia defines it as "behaviour that flouts societal norms". When it leads to violence, it can be termed 'psychosis'. When shared by many people, it can be called 'religion'. Warning: The previous sentence contained views that are considered by some to be shocking. If you do not want to be shocked, do not read the previous sentence. Also, that line isn't my own, but I'm too lazy to re-read The God Delusion to find out who said it. And I only brought up insanity to use that line. I tried writing a whole blog about it but failed miserably. And I can't talk about the game last night as most of my (2) readers have a pathological hatred of football. Which, given my lack of social skills, leaves me rather lacking in subjects. And, to be honest, you should probably be entertaining yourselves, rather than relying on me all the time. So I'll probably just stop here.

Song of the day: Ride a White Horse - Goldfrapp. This ode to a drug dealer has everything: 3 note bassline, derivative kickdrum/snare drumbeat, and breathy, sounds like she's about to fall asleep vocals. As well as the line "feels like real leather" which, unless I'm very much mistaken, is a description if this man's skin texture. But it is really good.

The End Of My (Exam) Period

Sorry to re-use the pun in the title, but I felt it was underappreciated the first time round, and so generously decided to give you another chance to revel in its glory. Or not. Your choice really.
Today was an important day for many reasons. It (finally) marked the end of my exams, about 2 weeks after everyone else had finished, it was yet another day where I managed to walk through the ice without falling over, and, perhaps most importantly, I got Bloc Party tickets. Which is pretty cool 'cos, y'know, I think they're good. Like Franz Ferdinand, but with more than one good album.
I haven't really got an overarching theme for this post, unlike my other concisely thematic, semi-articulate ramblings. But seeing as how I haven't posted for a while and I know how you all yearn for what is effectively my mental and verbal diarrhoea, I thought I'd better put up something. Even if it is only this pile of.....
Unfortunately, due to exams, nothings really been happening. Hence the complete lack of plot, events or humour. Although I have just got MGMT's album which, according to John, contains "just 7 good songs".
Hopefully next week will be service as usual, as I finally get more than 25 hours sleep over the week. And I don't actually have to do any work. Fun times.
I'm so sorry for wasting your time with this.

Song of the Day: 19-2000 - Gorillaz. Featuring the lyrics:

Day-du da bop
Day-du da bop
Day-du da bop
Day-du da bop
Oh Yeah.

Which, when you think about it, really probes deep into the heart of the human condition. Great songwriting.